Good bye old friend

So I am realising - I didn't have the worst time in the world ever as fatme. But I wasn't happy and she was protecting me from all the things I was hiding from.

I have just been looking through our photos and I want to say. 'thanks for the memories and all the fun we had, but I am ready to go it alone without you fatme.'

Slovenia June 2009

Croatia June 2009

VENICE JUNE 2009

ALGARVE 2006

I was a crazy teenager, instead of just telling someone I liked them I would get their number somehow and then text them - until they loved me, so they wouldn't care how I looked! I didn't just do it the once! How silly is that!

Reading a brilliant book on NLP - Diet where have you been all my life?! Thanks for coming to save me!

xx

Screw you brain - i'm not listening!

Seriously though - one would think that your mind would get bored of nagging about food and just get on with it but oh no not mine!

'Go on it's been 14 weeks' 'look how great you look' 'you've done so well' 'just one little cheap Easter Egg wont hurt!'

OMG I think I am a mentalist!

I went to the town to go to the gym then found myself in Tesco managed to break free without buying anything thank god! Ended up in B and M Bargains or whatever that shop is these days. Walked around for ages looking at EVERYTHING staring longingly at the cream eggs and speckled eggs 400g packets with 20% extra free!!! All super duper cheap because it is not Easter anymore.

And yes once upon a stupid time ago I would have taken them up on their half priced cream eggs and a couple of packets of speckled eggs and maybe even the big eggs they had too. BUT NOT ANYMORE

I have worked too hard and been too emotional to break over a cheap Easter Egg. No.

'ok so lets go home and have a boiled egg instead then?!'

Noooooooooooooooooo... bugger off!!!!!

Hol Hol Hol-iday

I have had a week and a half off so far and the time is just absolutely whizzing by - which amazes me as days off are normally the hardest for me!

Last week I got on the train from Market Harborough and took myself to Ipswich to see my sister. I went Market Harborough to London St Pancras £8

London St Pancras to London Liverpool St £4

London Liverpool St to Ipswich £8

Thanks Money Saving Expert - you really did save me money! I am not paying £65.50 when I can get there for £20 quid GENIUS!

So Tuesday was spent mostly travelling - Sally - who is looking fabulouso from all the cycling she is doing met me at the train station and we walked home to her house against the wind.

We chatted and when Baz got home we went for a walk to the Co op to buy their tea and I bought my Milko - Cause it was Milk Week! Was very tired from all my travelling as well.

Wednesday I got up ate my porridge drank my milk and went back to bed! didn't get back up until 1pm and then got up and got myself sorted and walked to town to meet Sally from School, In the underpass I got confuzzled and didn't know which way to go after turning and looking at all the ways and then just doing another 360 turn I realised I couldn't even remember which way I had come in!!! I managed to find my way out and in the direction of the shops which was good!

Did a fair amount of browsing and found myself stood in the Works looking at food porn for about an hour!! Mat Sal went and bought a pasta maker for her and Baz with a Ravioli attachment!

Diet surprising not going too badly not at all grumpy which was nice!

Thursday was a bit of a cookathon... I got up and I went to the shop and I bought stuff came home and started making Roast Parsnip Soup with the garden parsnips Baz had brought home from work. I did that then I made low fat pastry Cornish Pasties for them too. I then set about making their Easter Cakey also made with light marg and with Extra Light Philly icing! What a palaver! Had all this stuff lined up ready to put in the oven and Sally seems to have cleaned the numbers off her oven... AHEM Monica! AHEM!!! I text her and she called me and told me twenty pasts and twenty five pasts and other buttons to push :O)

Twenty minutes later FIRE ALARM started screeching at me!! Bugger! pressed the buttons... nothing! it wouldn't shush - got the cookbook tried wafting and still... nothing - opened back door , switched on cooker hood (after banging head on it!) More wafting... nothing!!!

Sent Sally a text :DON'T PANIC! I have set the fire alarm off and can't get it to stop?! I promise there is no fire or flames and smoke... well obviously some smoke but house standing... HELP?

Back to fire alarm pushed buttons for longer and it stopped. Phew sent another text. All fine it's stopped don't panic!

Every time I stay with Sally I create some kind of disaster, at Chelmsford I dropped something really tiny and hundreds of them all over her kitchen floor and couldn't find the hoover attachments! In France I fell over put my elbow through the camp bed and almost broke it - my elbow that is - the camp bed was definitely definitely broken! Bless I am sure she looks forward to my SOS texts!

After I finished with the cookathon Sally and I went to town to get her some skinny jeans as it was her end of term teachers night out. I bought a pretty little floral cardigan and I tried a pretty size 14 top on in new look and it fitted beautifully :) hurray! But I did not buy it I am saving my money for my size 12's!

We went out and had a lot of fun Sally got battered and I chatted with my soda water to all of her teaching cronies and I watched her try to boogie and walk in her killer heels! She has some lovely friends around her which is good. Completely free night out for me on my soda water lots of fun though! Watched an enormous woman bundle out of a nightclub and fight her friend trying to bite her, only to end up being bundled on to the floor clothes everywhere being pinned down by five people including two police officers both of which she assulted. What a state.

I did notice though that there were buttloads of dedicated followers of fashion out with their skinny jeans little tops and killer heels.

Think I might leave it there as it's as good a place as any to pause for part one of the Holiday!

Loving life at the moment! xxx

Happy Girl x

The End of Group - middle of my Journey

To start group Tabitha did a great thing for us all. An emotional but great thing.

We each wrote our name on our piece of paper and passed it to the person on the left - who wrote something about the person named and then folded it up and passed it left again.

I am going to share mine here. I couldn't read it out loud. It is hard enough to hear or read compliments let alone say them and believe them.

I am so grateful for the wonderful ladies. Not just a group but a bunch of friends for life. Thanks girls!

Shelley

Wow What can I say?! What an inspiration- you are beautiful, an amazing person I am so glad to have got to know - I am sure we'll always be friends! Well done you fabulous girl!

Wow!! Such a Wonderful Journey - A true inspiration Blogs and all. Be happy you really deserve it!

Wonderwoman! Wonderful result - proud of you x

You are the soul of the group! Thank you for sharing with us! Tears, smiles, support! Love xx

Sweetest person, very encouraging

Always Smiling

Inspiration - very chatty - thoroughly nice person

Always a pleasure to see you and so proud that you are getting where you want to go!

Inspiring and helpful.

Those kind words from everyone will help me feel better in down moments I know it.

Taking off for now xx